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Sunday, January 30, 2005

Follow-Up To "A Challenge"

Here are my comments in reply to a rabid Moonbat:

"Against the war? Yes, still. War is the health of the state and never justifiable under any circumstance."
"never justifiable under any circumstance." ? WTF kinda logic is that ? By that logic we could not have responded to Japan attacking Pearl Harbor ! "never justifiable under any circumstance." ? This is BS in it's highest order !

"Self-Defense is not war-mongering, and this was not a war of self-defense.
"Really ? Saddam's regime rewarded and harbored Terrorists. This was an act of self-defense. Again, WTF kinda logic is that ?
"If it is okay for you to viciously remove a vicious man from power what keeps someone from doing the same thing to you, after all, you feel it is right to wage war on those who disagree with you? By your own morality, you are now fair game."
Yes, It's OK to viciously remove a vicious man from power.
I took the libery of correcting you spelling. We viciously removed Hitler. We viciously removed Tojo. I see, so liberating a nation from a brutal Dictator that rewarded and harbored Terrorists makes us the same. Again: WTF kinda logic is that ?

"John, believe me, I understand the desire to right the wrongs of the world but forcing other people to use their money and lives (represented by their taxes) to enact your will is wrong. If you think these things are right, you pay the price, you fund it. But, don't make me do it. If somehow this war was fought to rid Iraq of an overlord and free their people, why are you so willing to enslave me to do it? Don't you see the basic illogic of that?"
Oh I see, so our forced contributions to the failed policies of the Socialists (The Democrats for those of you that don't know) for fifty years were not enslaving us ? The policies that have us working half the year to support, programs that we don't believe in, never voted for and are prime examples of failure ? Again: WTF kinda logic is that ?
"Or am I just another stupid moonbat?"
Yes. Yes you are..
"It's that kind of unthinking, emotional response that only perpetuates the violence and recriminations on both sides, both here and on the ground in Iraq."
You're the ones that help perpetuate the violence and recriminations. You're the ones that find nothing good in anything this country has done in the past fifty years. You are the ones always eager to blame America first. Americans are sick of that message. We reject you and all you stand for.

"I don't begrudge you your war-mongering. I don't like it, but that is just what it is. Please stop begrudging me (and, by extension, others like me) my desire for a peaceful and voluntary solution to the problem."
This is not "war-mongering". This is self preservation. I invite you to read this: Religion Of Hate. If you have the nerve and the "Open Mind" you so often claim you have and we lack.

"peaceful and voluntary solution to the problem"
Read the above link and tell me how the hell that's possible ?

Microsoft Bashing Is More Than Getting Old

I for one am sick of the "Microsoft is the root of all evil groups". It's even more tiring and old than the "Blame Bush for everything" groups. There were ample opportunities for other companies to overtake MicroSnot. From Dr DOS to OS/2 to Lotus, To Ashton Tate to IBM to Borland. All of which had MicroSnot reeling at one time or another. MicroSnot won. They had the better business plan. They had what the market demanded. Yeah it's buggy. But it's what the consumer bought. The fact is the EU can't stand Capitalism. They can't allow the consumer to make a choice. If I were Bill Gates I'd take a page out of "Atlas Shrugged" and say "Fine. We won't sell Windows in the EU. Find something better A-Holes."

Follow up: I wouldn't be surprised if the EU took another page out of "Atlas Shrugged" and forced MicroSnot to sell their product at a loss under a different name. Much as Reardon Steel became Miracle Metal.

Happy Birthday !

Richard (Dick) B. Cheney (1941):

Vice President of the United States who has served three Presidents as an elected official. Cheney earned both his bachelor’s and master’s degree in Political Science at the University of Wyoming, and caught the attention of Representative Donald Rumsfeld while he was doing a fellowship for a local Republican congressman. Rumsfeld was so impressed with Cheney’s character and intelligence that he hired him to assist the Office of Economic Opportunity under President Nixon. A rising star on the political scene, Cheney served on Nixon’s Cost of Living Council, and with the advent of the Ford Administration in 1974, Cheney became one of the youngest men ever to be named White House Chief of Staff. When Ford left the White House, Cheney returned to Wyoming to be elected to Congress, and in 1989 he was named Secretary of Defense by President George Bush. For his leadership during the Gulf War, Cheney was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom in 1991.

Our nation owes a lot of gratitude for your service sir. You have been one of the most effective Vice Presidents in our history and I for one salute you.

This Day In History

  • 1798 - The first brawl in the U.S. House of Representatives was witnessed by legislators. Congressmen Matthew Lyon and Roger Griswold fought on the House floor. Are you ready to rumble ?!?!
  • 1815 - The United States purchases Thomas Jefferson's library as the nucleus of the Library of Congress. Jefferson's more than 6,000 books help replace those burned by the British during the War of 1812. You think Vietnam was the most unpopular war in American history ? You must have gone to public school. Ironic that this war almost caused secession by several states prior to the civil war, and was the war that our National Anthem arose from. Some times what some people call the wrong war can cause the right things to happen. Something for those on the left to remember.
  • 1862 - The U.S. Navy's first ironclad warship, the "Monitor", was launched.
  • 1933 - "The Lone Ranger" was heard on radio for the first time. The program ran for 2,956 episodes and ended in 1955. Not many people realize that the Lone Ranger was the Green Hornet's Grandfather. Not that it matters really, what with them both being fictional and all. But hey ! Bruce Lee kicked ass !
  • 1948 - Mohandas Gandhi is assassinated in New Delhi. The political and spiritual leader of India's independence movement, Gandhi staged numerous nonviolent -- and highly effective -- protests against British authority. His assassin, a Hindu fanatic, objected to Gandhi's tolerance for the Muslims. Most people point to Gandhi as the way to bring peaceful settlement to any political situation completely ignoring that if he would have tried this against, oh say the Nazis or the Italian Fascists or the Communists. He would have been dead the first day. Still, he played on the conscience of the British populace and succeeded in winning Indian Self Rule. Which was a great accomplishment. I can't help but think of that old Bob & Tom Bit though... The New New Delhi Deli.
  • 1972 - In Northern Ireland, British soldiers shot and killed thirteen Roman Catholic civil rights marchers. The day is known as "Bloody Sunday." Which U2 turned into a number one smash hit song.
  • 1973 - G. Gordon Liddy and James W. McCord, former President Nixon reelection campaign members, are convicted of breaking into and illegally tapping Democratic Party headquarters (Watergate hotel). Which was pretty f'ing stupid of them. Nixon's poles at the time suggested he would win in a land slide. It was totally pointless to do it. It's something that tarnishes the Republicans to this day.
  • 1981 - Nearly 2 million New Yorkers turn out for a ticker-tape parade honoring the freed American hostages held captive in Iran for 444 days before being released January 20. The reason they were released ? Ronald Regan was elected.
  • 1997 - A New Jersey judge ruled that the unborn child of a female prisoner must have legal representation. He denied the prisoner bail reduction to enable her to leave the jail and obtain an abortion. ?? A New Jersey judge that had a soul ? Must be an aberration.
  • 2002 - Slobodan Milosevic accused the U.N. war crimes tribunal of an "evil and hostile attack" against him. Milosevic was defending his actions during the Balkan wars. Actually, I'm starting to think he was a scapegoat. The Religion Of Hate had invaded his country and the rest of the EU is starting to feel the same strain. He recognized that his nation would no longer exist if the Religion of Hate were allowed to prosper. I direct you to the Required Reading portion of this Blog before leaving comments.

Wow, busy day in history.

GWB OR JFK? An Inaugural Twist

Galvin does a good job here. Seems that at one time... long long ago... Democrats stood for something. Who knew ?

Site Layout

I made some minor changes to the layout of this Blog over the weekend. I added a synopsis of the Giant Overlord War® Section (The war the Main Stream Media doesn't want you to know about.) and a Required Reading Section over on the right.

OMG ! Finally ! Trackbacks !

I guess I've finally arrived !
Not only did I get my first ever Trackback, I got three in one day !
(wipes tear of joy from cheek)
Excuse me, I... I can't talk just now...
No pictures ! No pictures please !

Kerry has a fix for Social Security: Raise Taxes

This is but one of many reasons he lost.

Election Reaction

Superhawk has a good roundup and some preditions.

And So It Begins

Iraq Voters Defy Threats, Boycott Calls

Good for them.

You know, the MSM and the Demoncrats predicted disaster for this election just like they predicated disaster for the Afghanistan elections. Actually they seemed eager for disaster. In both cases they were proven incredibly wrong.

I'll bet they still won't get it. I bet the MSM will still wonder why their ratings continue to plunge and the Demoncrats will still wonder why more and more Americans reject them.

It's because they are wrong an incredible amount of the time. Only the most thick skulled person can keep seeing them be wrong time and again and continue to think they're right.

Even now, the MSM continues to focus on what little bad happened during the voting. Forty four deaths. It's unclear if they count the terrorists as part of the count but they usually do. That's pretty much a normal daily body count in Iraq. I'm not saying the deaths weren't tragic, but it's nothing like the blood bath predicted by the Demoncrats and the MSM. The point here is they continue to focus on the wrong part of the story. The big story is the success of the election. They can't even get the focus of the story right.

This is a great day for Iraq.
This is a great day for America.

I Have Met the F*CKTARD, His Name is Nick

I laughed a long time after reading this. Warning, strong f'ing language.

Saturday, January 29, 2005

I'm About Done With Blog Explosion

In all the surfing and credits et all, I've only gotten 3 visits from the directory, 1 visit from searches. I've only gotten one comment. 11 clicks on my banners. What's the point ? I visit other sites, leave comments, trackbacks. What do I get ?

So I'm surfing On Blogazoo...

And my credits go down ! WTF ?

Follow up: They responded as follows:

Noah,That is because more people are reading your Blog, and the credits are going out faster than you can read other Blogs to keep up. This is NOT a bad thing, as your Blog IS being seen A LOT!As more Blogs are entered into the system (which I am currently approving about 50+ an hour), this will slow down a bit.We now have almost 500 members (in less than 3 days), so your Blog will get some excellent exposure here.If you have any further questions, please contact us again.

I responded as follows:

Excuse me ?
The credits I've earned should not be subtracted before I assign them !
I assigned only 50% for auto !
I went from well into 200 credits to 6.5 !
How in the hell does that make sense ?

Further follow up:
You can't reply to their e-mails. It's an invalid address. How are you supposed to carry on a dialog with people that won't give you a means to reply ? I had to go back to their contact us page and start all over. This sucks.

Further Further Follow Up:
"Noah,My apologies. I did not know you had not assigned them from your first contacted added 200 credits to your account, and our programmer is currently looking into any possibilities. Thus far, your problem is the first one of it's nature. Please monitor the added credits to ensure they are not used without your assigning them.Try as we can, we can not anticipate every possible problem, but we can work to fix them once identified.As to contacting us, there are 4 of us maintaining this contact system. By using this system, we can track each request, and insure it is taken care of. Direct e-mail to an individual does not allow verification or database tracking.We are adding 3 more means of Support over the next 24-48 hours. This will include live voice conferencing, a Forum, and a Support Blog. We are also looking into a full featured help desk with live text chat.You can access the voice conference from this page (Removed By Me For SecurityResons) and talk to us directly if you wish.We intend to offer superior support and service. We are always looking at ways to improve it. Your opinions are taken into account in this.Richard TaylorBlogAzoo Admin Team".

I don't know what happened here. Maybe I did something wrong. But I feel a lot better about Blogazoo. I still don't understand why they give an invalid return e-mail address though. "Direct e-mail to an individual does not allow verification or database tracking." ? Excuse me ? How can anything allow for more verification or database tracking than an e-mail address ?

Follow Follow Follow Up:
Maybe it's the lack of sleep and maybe I assigned those credits and forgot. At any rate the people at Blogazoo have responded quickly to my concerns. They have been very attentive and eager to address my complaint. I may have screwed up. I may be in the wrong. I feel much much better for their responsiveness and I have no problem with them at this point.

Stop Bitching Start A Revolution

This is a real eye opener. They want a revolution ? Too bad we're the ones with the guns. Bring it on Moonbats !

Follow up: I keep watching this over and over. It is so funny !

Carl Rove is the Anti-Christ ! ROTFL !

Haz She Drowned In Naked Chocolatey Goodness ?

She hasn't been heard from since ! What a way to go !


Hauntingly beautiful.

What Happened To The Kennedy's

It's good to know that not all of our nation's youth are worthless hippies. ;-)

Missiles Anyone?

From Alekstheblogger.

Thank You Hollywood!


Religion Of Peace

This should be required reading for everyone.

Friday, January 28, 2005

There's Plenty Of Room For All Of God's Creatures

Click on the pic to enlarge

Great one Mike J !

International Emoticon Conference

I was going to attend but, you know, the weather and all.

News Not News

The crystal ball knows all !

A Letter To Senator Ted Kennedy

Semper Fei !

Giant Snowman Overlord™ Crushes Members Of Resistance !

When will the Giant Overlords Wars® ever be over ?

Bush and Kennedy Inaugural Speeches: Some Comparisons

Bravo Rocco !

Jihad For Kids

What can I Say ? Cao keeps coming through.


Cao never ceases to impress.

This Day In History

  • 1788 - The first British penal settlement was founded at Botany Bay. Kahn later used the Botany Bay to escape Earth after the losing Earth's Eugenics War in the 1990s. Thus leading to inevitable confrontation with Captain James T. Kirk.

  • 1807 - London's Pall Mall became the first street lit by gaslight. Soon to be followed by Pall Malls being lit with gas lighters.
  • 1871 - France surrendered in the Franco-Prussian War. They've done nothing but surrender ever since.
  • 1878, the first commercial telephone exchange in the U.S. was installed at New Haven, Connecticut, and served 21 subscribers connected by a single strand of iron wire. For the first six weeks, the exchange was not operated at night. Instead of "hello," the first experimental shout was "Ahoy, ahoy." The first operator was George W. Coy. A Bell franchise had been awarded for New Haven and Middlesex Counties to Coy on 3 Nov 1877, paid for by incorporating as a company with two financial partners. Coy improvised his first crude switchboard, using carriage bolts, handles from teapot lids and bustle wire. The concept of interconnecting phone wires had been tried before by three other men, but none of these men attempted commercial telephone operations. The system was quickly overwhelmed by the subscribers' teenaged daughters.
  • 1909 - The United States ended direct control over Cuba. Boy was that a mistake.
  • 1921 - Einstein startled Berlin by suggesting the possibility of measuring the universe.
  • 1922 - The National Football League (NFL) franchise in Decatur, IL, transferred to Chicago. The team took the name Chicago Bears. People today vaguely remember when Chicago had a football team.
  • 1935 - Iceland became the first country to introduce legalized abortion.
  • 1958 - Construction began on first private thorium-uranium nuclear reactor. It was the first reactor designed to supplement fissionable uranium-235 with fertile thorium-232. This was the Indian Point nuclear generating station, built at Buchanan, New York, at a cost of $100 million. It was a pressurized water reactor able to produce 275,000 kilowatts of power. The design and construction was executed by the Babcock and Wilcox Co. for the Consolidated Edison Co. The Indian Point 1 operating licence was dated 26 Mar 1962 and its shutdown date was 31 Oct 1974.
  • 1960 The first photograph bounced off of the moon. It was received at Washington, D.C., having been transmitted from Hawaii by the U.S. Navy.
  • 1965 - General Motors reported the biggest profit of any U.S. company in history. The seventies changed that.
  • 1983 - Dover, New Jersey's WDHA becomes the first commercial radio station to air music from a compact disc.
  • 1986 U.S. Space Shuttle, Challenger, explodes only 74 seconds into its flight. All seven members of the crew perish, including school teacher, Christa McAuliffe. The U.S. space program's worst disaster, Challenger's ill-fated flight occurs exactly 19 years and a day after the Apollo 1 tragedy that killed three astronauts.

  • 1994 In Los Angeles, Superior Court Judge Stanley Weisberg declared a mistrial in the case of Lyle Menendez in the murder of his parents. Lyle, and his brother Erik, were both retried later and were found guilty. They were sentenced to life in prison without parole. Much to good a fate for them.
  • 2002 Toys R Us Inc. announced that it would be closing 27 Toys R Us stores and 37 Kids R Us stores in otder to cut costs and boost operating profits. Noooooo !

Obstructionist Partisan Cratz

For a party who had the gall to suggest that Republicans need to "reach across the aisle" to work together in harmony, the cratz sure have an odd way of showing their intentions are very honorable to achieve the same end.

Here here !

Thursday, January 27, 2005

Madame Secretary

What's wrong with the hood ?
Can you imagine a conservative with his background getting away with this ? The MSM would have a field day ! Objective my ass.

More Persuasion, Less Kill Bill

From Ang's Weird Ideas "a proud member of the Reality-Based Community"... whatever that means. Still a good post.

I Finally Got A Comment At blogexplosion !

Thanks for being gentle Blueskelton.

All Dolled Up

Va Va Va Voom !

A Challenge

From John Rogers (Any relation to Steve "Captain America" Rogers ?)

The ACLU and a Tale of Two Deaths

Excellent post by Res Publica 2005.

Blog Roll

I added a Blog Roll to the page today. This is where I'll be adding Blogs I've found of note lately.

The Lighter Side

Found over at Misadventures Of Jer. You can also view here.

When I Was Your Age


Global Warming 'Twice As Bad As Previously Thought'

Which explains the 1-month snowfall setting a 113-year high in Boston.

Where's That Religious Fanatic We Elected ?

Wednesday, January 26, 2005

We Men Are Such Pigs


New DUI Test

Click the pic to play
. Windows Media Viewer (900K)

Sent to me by Ace Reporter MPS.

Sunday, January 23, 2005

Remember Roe v. Wade

Remember, those women knew what the risks were when they got the abortion. They spent a lot of money and accepted the risk, all in hopes of living a slightly better life.

They should have thought of a better life before creating a child. Instead they chose to murder the child.
I think too few people understand the slaughter of adult women that Roe ended.

And ignore the slaughter of innocent children that Roe started. Typical.

Follow up: I have every right to speak on this subject. I'm adopted. My twin brother was adopted (duh). I have twin sisters (not blood related, again duh) eleven months younger than myself that were adopted. All of us would have been murdered legally if Roe v. Wade had been around. Millions of children have been murdered legally since RvW. The majority not for health reasons. The majority were murdered because the pregnancy was inconvenient. My family would not exist if RvW was in force then.

Let's get one thing straight : There's No Such Thing as a Kerry Blue State!

Well said.

The Spoon And The String

A timeless lesson on how consultants can make a difference for an organization.

Last week, we took some friends out to a new restaurant, and noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket It seemed a little strange. When the busboy brought our water and utensils, I noticed he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket. Then I looked around saw that all the staff had spoons in their pockets. When the waiter came back to serve our soup I asked, "Why the spoon?"
"Well, "he explained, "the restaurant's owners hired Andersen Consulting to revamp all our processes. After several months of analysis, they concluded that the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. It represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour If our personnel are better prepared, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift."
As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he was able to replace it with his spare. I'll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now."
I was impressed. I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of the waiter's fly. Looking around, I noticed that all the waiters had the same string hanging from their flies. So before he walked off, I asked the waiter, "Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string right there?"
"Oh, certainly!" Then he lowered his voice. "Not everyone is so observant. That consulting firm I mentioned also found out that we can save time in the restroom. By tying this string to the tip of you know what, we can pull it out without touching it and eliminate the need to wash our hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39 percent.
I asked "After you get it out, how do you put it back?"
"Well," he whispered, "I don't know about the others, but I use the spoon.

Sent By Mary.

Hail to the Thief

I looked forward to participating in some anti-Bush protests downtown today, but I accidentally showered this morning and blew all my plans.

That first line was enough to make me laugh. The rest is gold.

Church Plans to Bury the Ashes of Fetuses From Abortion Clinic

"They have taken it upon themselves to make a macabre ritual out of this, inflicting pain on everyone," said clinic director Dr. Warren Hern. "I have women calling me who are very upset over this. These fanatics simply cannot leave other people alone with their most intimate sorrow."

As usual the Moonbat gets it wrong. This is about the dignified burial of murdered children. The discomfort of the "Mothers" that murdered their children is imaterial. They chose to murder their children. The children did not chose to be murdered. Also, this Rabid Moonbat thinks nothing of the pain inflicted upon the human children (Read "Fetus" for you "compassionate" Liberals).
The remains of 3,000 fetuses are buried near the wall. On Sunday, 600 to 1,000 small boxes of ashes will be emptied into a tomb and covered.

3,000 Children. All from one Death Camp (Read Clinic).
"I can't praise the church enough for giving a human life a proper burial," Leslie Hanks, spokeswoman for Colorado Right to Life, said. "When in the last 2,000 years, except for 1973 with Roe vs. Wade, would we not have thought a proper burial the appropriate thing to do?"
Fortunately The Roe Effect is starting to take hold and soon the aberration of legalized murder will cease.

You Know People, Comments And Trackbacks Are Allowed.

Hillary perverted Dr. King's Dream

Powerline again comes through.

Follow up:
Here's my thoughts:

The Libs always judge by race, not by character. My family (Irish by origin but NOT Irish-American, We're American !) wasn't even in this country when slavery was an institution (In half the country, what does the other half have to feel guilty about ?) I spent most of my life in Indiana and Hyphenated-Americans would always seek to divide us over something this country fought to abolish and did ! This country was one of the first to recognize that judging people by their skin, race, or religion was wrong. It was the race in power at the time that chose to change things. Whites have nothing to apologize for. Slavery was common place among almost all nations at the time. Never forget that most of the Africans sold into slavery were sold by their own people. It doesn't make it right, but it's a fact. Whitey was not solely to blame for it. Conservatives (at the time Republicans) fought for their freedom. The Demoncrats fought against it. Conservatives today believe every man (meaning mankind for you feminazis with a chip on your shoulder) is equal and deserves equal opportunity. DemocRats believe that people of color can't compete, therefore Affirmative Action is required. Isn't that inherently racist ? Look at Dr. Condoleezza Rice and General Colin Powell. They are sneered at and libeled and slandered by the DemoncRats at every turn because they succeeded at the American dream. Dr. Martin Luther King's dream has been achieved despite the DemocRat's best efforts. I now yield the floor. :-)

Naked Chocolatey goodness

I mean, how can you pass up a post that starts:

You know what I need? To get naked and soak in chocolate.

I mean Really how could you ?

Fox News Kicks Some Ass

Here's my comments:

Since the dawn of network television the American public has had to put up with an obviously biased liberal media until quite recently. We've known for years that we can't take what they report as fact until we or someone else checks the facts. Fortunately it is very easy for the average person to do so and more often than not Fox gets it right. It's no wonder that their ratings are up. The wonder is why broadcast Fox doesn't compete using the Fox News Channel against the big three's prime time "news" broadcasts. They'd clean their clocks ! It's a given that they'd at least beat SeeBS.

Another Rabid Moonbat Engaged In Mindless Symbolism

It's fun just to jab at them from time to time.

Howard The Duck

From ABB 2 ABD.
Dean getting the chairmanship of the Democratic Party would be the greatest thing to happen for Republicans and Libertarians since, well... GWB's second inauguration ! If the Demoncrats want to go further to the left, God Speed.

What A Rabid Moonbat

I'll Fisk him later.

Hear Ye, Hear Ye: Sanhedrin Seeks David's Scion As King

One of the ideas, members said, is to climb the Mount and build the altar within minutes and sacrifice the lamb before security forces can stop them. Another, said leading Sanhedrin member Baruch Ben-Yosef, is to pray for a tsunami-like disaster on the Mount. "In one second, God wiped out 150,000 people," he said. "Who knows? Maybe he'll help us if we show him we are ready."

Found via Ha-Mikdash.

Urban Gymnastics- Unbelievably Extreme Stuff

Whoa !

Bravo !

Well said D Brooks !

This Day In History

1941 - Lindbergh to Congress: Negotiate with Hitler.

Good Illustration

A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday Sermon. Four worms were placed into four separate jars. The first worm was put into a jar of alcohol. The second worm was put into a jar of cigarette smoke.The third worm was put into a jar of sperm. The fourth worm was put into a jar of good clean soil.
At the conclusion of the Sermon, the Minister reported the following results:
  • The first worm in alcohol - Dead.
  • The second worm in cigarette smoke - Dead.
  • Third worm in sperm - Dead.
  • Fourth worm in good clean soil - Alive.

So the Minister asked the congregation - What can you learn from this demonstration? A little old woman in the back quickly raised her hand and said, "As long as you drink, smoke and have sex, you won't have worms!"Don't you just love little old ladies????

Sent by my Mom.


Found via hybr1s.


Found via Blue Glow Worm.

Beer Goggles

Found over at 8 Z E R O 8

New Hope For Ukraine As Viktor Yushchenko Is Sworn In

Next On ESPN7, Camel Wrestling

Gelidonya the camel (top) wrestles with Megastar during the annual camel wrestling tournament, in the western Turkish city of Aydin, January 23, 2005. Camel wrestling is a popular event in the Aegean region of Turkey and attracts thousands of spectators. The bull camels are usually long-haired cross breed and reared for their aggressions. REUTERS/Fatih Saribas

Just when you think you've heard of everything.

Dead Giant Squid Overlords™ Inundate Beach

"Scientists are trying to figure out why hundreds of the three-to-four-metre long squids washed up overnight along the southern California coast."

Isn't it obvious ? They're tired of the whales getting all the press !

As usual, Aquaman could not be reached for comment.

Photo found over at The Cave.

Homer Simpson ?

PRAGUE (Reuters) - A Czech man is being taken to court after he hid in a restaurant washroom until the employees had left and then hooked up beer kegs directly to his mouth. Cleaning staff found him drunk and lying on the floor of the bar at the restaurant in the city of Brno, about 200km (120 miles) east of Prague, the CTK news agency reported on Thursday."He had broken the door of the cooling mechanism ... and detached the hoses leading from the keg, squashed them in his mouth and literally filled himself up with beer," CTK quoted a police official as saying. The man will be charged with damaging property because he caused 8,000 crown ($340) damage to the beer cooling box.

Oh sure, who hasn't?

Iran Warns US Against Military Action

Satellite image released by DIGITALGLOBE shows the Bushehr nuclear reactor site in Iran approximately 17kms (10, miles) south of the city of Bushehr. Iran said it was not taking talk of a US attack seriously, but nevertheless cautioned Washington that military action against the Islamic republic would be a 'major strategic Blunder.'(AFP/DIGITALGLOBE/File)

Hell, we'll just have Israel bomb it like they bombed the one in Iraq.

US likely to double bounty for bin Laden to 50 million dollars

50 million dollars would by a lot of beer...
But I'd shoot the bastard for free.

They May Be French, But They're Still Cute

White babies: Baron(L) and Emperor, two three-week-old white lion cubs from the same father but two different mothers rest at Prein's circus near Agen, south western France. (AFP/Jean-Louis Borderie)

"White babies" ? Is that some kind of racial slur ?

Rest In Peace

Beware Darth Tater

What more is there to say ?

Followup: Evidently there was a great deal to say.

Norwegians Confused by Bush Salute

President Bush's "Hook 'em, 'horns" salute got lost in translation in Norway, where shocked people interpreted his hand gesture during his inauguration as a salute to Satan.

Headbangers were also confused thinking Pantera was somewhere in the crowd.

Saturday, January 22, 2005

Did You Hear The One About The Frog Taking Out A Loan ?

There once was a little frog who wanted to take out a home improvement loan to fix up his pad. His name is Kermit Jagger.
He hopped over to his local bank, went up to the teller and said, "Hi, I'd like to take out a loan to fix up my pad."
The teller replied, "You need to see our loan officer. Her name is "Patricia Black."
So the frog hops over to the loan officer's desk and sits down. When Patricia arrives she ask, "What can I do for you?"

The frog says, "I'd like to take out a loan to fix up my pad."

Patricia asked, "What do you have for collateral?"
After thinking for a couple of moments about what he could offer the frog reaches into his little froggy pocket and pulls out a small white elephant.
"This is a very unusual form of collateral." said Patricia.
"I'll have to check with our bank president to see if it's ok."
Patricia goes to the president and says, "There's a frog named Kermit Jagger
out there who want's a home loan and this white elephant is all he is offering for collateral. What should I do?"
The bank president takes the small white elephant and after carefully examining it hands it back to Patricia and says,
"It's a nick-knack Patty Black give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."

Heard it a while back, but I still like it.

Do You Know the Way to Mexifornia?

Took the lady a lot of guts to say what needs to be said. Although I find Michael Savage to be a bit abrasive, he does have a very important point to make which Crystal Clear has seen first hand.

"Wake up, America! Our borders, language, and culture are being threatened, and it's up to us, as principled patriotic citizens, to defend and protect the freedoms we cherish."
My biggest complaint against the Bush Administration has been the failure to tighten our borders. I have nothing against legal immigration. But that does remind me of something...

"Our family has had problems with immigrants ever since we came to this country."

A Liberal's Idea of Freedom

Zendo Deb impresses me as well.

Imagine if you can, the shoe being on the other foot

Racism only applies to conservatives.

Rick Continues To Empress

"First, wasn't it a novelty to see John Kerry in the Senate?"

Wasn't this the guy that missed 76% of the Senate Intelligence Committee Meetings ? Wasn't this the guy that passed 4 Bills and 4 Resolutions in 20 years ? Is there any wonder he was called "John Kerry: The Ghost Senator" ? Wasn't this the guy that snubbed the Iraqi Interim President's visit ? Rick's right, it was quite the novelty to see him actually show up. It was no surprise to see him and Boxer vote against Ms. Rice. If they were Republicans screams of racism would be all over the MSM.


The Moonbats are trying to define themselves, which goes to show even they don't know what they really stand for, if anything. Rick does a good job Fisking them. My sincere condolences to Rick for having to live in the Nazi State of Illinois.

"I hate Illinois Nazis." - Jake Blues

How Quo Poe Felt Today

I laughed outloud on that one. :-)

Who Said It?

He sure was a war-mongering hate-filled extremist fascist right-wing Repugnican wasn't he ?

Too Close To True

Found over at Stick And Stones. The name of the site reminds me of one of the few things I remember from all the wasted hours of watching Gilligan's Island Reruns... It was one of those "Dream Episodes" and Gilligan was Dr. Jekyll... I think. He said "Sticks and stones may break my bones but, please, don't throw stick and stones !". Don't know if that has anything to do with anything...

Support The Companies That Support Your Positions Part Two

Use this as a reverse barometer. Buy RED. Just like the site they've ripped off.

Global Warming = Everybody Dead

The “Great Dying”, which happened 250 million years ago, is now thought to have been caused by global warming, which was caused by extreme volcanic activity. It was initially thought that something from beyond-an asteroid or comet-had caused the near extinction of every living thing on this planet.

“Animals and plants both on land and in the sea were dying at the same time and apparently from the same causes: too much heat and too little oxygen,” says University of Washington paleontologist Peter Ward

Global Warming! From recent news we’ve all heard that SUV’s have been causing increased global warming for the last decade. I have a feeling that because of this increase it will now take only a minimal amount of volcanic activity to trigger a massive death trap.

Because removing SUV’s from the equation is simply ridiculous, we have only one course of action: Stop volcanoes before they kill us all!

How to stop volcanoes from killing us:

First you have to understand what volcanoes actually are. From various documents and pictures I have studied, I have learned that they are mountain-like objects, some with holes in the top, that spew hot lava up from the bowels of the earth. The reason they erupt is apparently some sort of anti-gravity forces generated from the Moon, probably when it has expanded to its largest state and has its most power (a full moon phase).

Ok, now that we have the basics we need to find a solution to the problem. We need to stop them from erupting. Here are the tactics we have to choose from:

Take away the source - Drain the lava from the earth
Take away the method - Plug the holes on these mountains
Take away the cause - Destroy the moon
Each of these methods has their own plusses and minuses.

In order to drain the earth you would have to open up the bottom. Luckily at the bottom of the earth, the South Pole, it is very cold which would prevent the heat of the lava from melting the sides of the hole as it drains. The problem with this method is that it will remove crucial inner-earth support needed to keep the earth’s round shape. And that support will be desperately needed with all the SUVs on the roads.

The second option is to try to plug all of the holes in the earth to keep the lava in. Experts disagree on what material would be best to plug the holes. Conventional wisdom says to completely knock over the volcano and build a mall/parking complex in the space but experts say that would be risky.

[ed: Nathan has just brought up the “Superman IV Theory” which may apply here. ]

That leaves only one more option….destroying the moon. The showdown between the earth and the moon has been on the horizon for a while (actually twice a day). Some say the moon was behind the deadly tsunami in Asia last month but a spokesman for the moon, Ralph Nader, denied the allegation. Stardust Sportsbook in Las Vegas has the earth as early favorites as cooperation between all of the world powers is expected. The irony of world peace due to SUVs is lost in the struggle for survival.

Some very well thought out logic on the causes and solutions to the Global Warming "Problem".

Found over at Slowplay.

This Day In History

1973 - Roe v. Wade resulting in 43 million murders to date, and counting.

Friday, January 21, 2005

Some Interesting Sayings

Found over at surinderxx.

Some Clever Phrases

No wonder English is so hard to learn.

The bandage was wound around the wound.
The farm was used to produce produce.
The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
We must polish the Polish furniture.
He could lead if he would get the lead out.
The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
I did not object to the object.
The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
They were too close to the door to close it.
The buck does funny things when the does are present.
A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
After a number of Novocain injections, my jaw got number.
Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

Thursday, January 20, 2005

Man Hurls Self At Giant Eyeball Overlords™, Becomes Stuck In Iris !

Frozen Woman's Plea For Help Finally Answered !

"Finally ! If I could move I would have picked it myself !"

Giant Monkey Overlords™ defecate On California Highway !

Workers struggled for hours to remove a huge Giant Monkey Overlords™ feces from a California highway earlier today. The incident is expected to cause residents to possibly change their allegiance away from the Giant Monkey Overlords ™ and possibly start to back the Giant Eyeball Overlords™ depending on what entitlement programs the Giant Eyeball Overlords™ provide.

Beware The Islamic Terrorist Kittens !

"You have no chance to survive make your time."

Giant Monkey Overlords™ Force Woman To Become Human Cork Screw !

The Horror !

Why I Had To Help My Brave Sister In 26-Hour Suicide

"She repeatedly tried to suffocate herself with a plastic bag, "howling" with despair as she reached the point of being unable to resist taking a breath" - Graham Lawson

"Have some mercy and Kevorkian me to sleep." - Artificial Joy Club

Found over at Kevin, M.D. - Medical Weblog.

Moonbats Display Their Ignorance And Vileness

Annie Katz, 52, of New York, at the rear of a group of protesters, said the experience was worth it despite the bad view. Katz said she was upset, too, by the 2000 election, but this year, "I'm angrier this time, since I'm angry about the war."

You know, someone really ought to tell these idiots that the war's been over for a while now. Did anyone say that WWII wasn't over until we left Germany or Japan ? If that was the case, then you could argue that we're still fighting WWII.

U.S. soldiers in dress uniforms and blue coats were greeted with chants of "no more wars."

And they get mad when they're called unpatriotic and don't support our troops.

Before the swearing-in, about 500 people rallied in a park several miles from the Capitol.

500 people. That's all they could muster. Pathetic.

Boxer, Queen Of Moonbats VS Rice

If she wasn't a DemocRat, the MSM would be calling her a racist.
The full transcript of Boxer's shameful exchange with Rice is available above.

Bush's Mandate

Great work from William J. Bennett.

Happy Inauguration Day !

Thank God it's Bush !

We are led, by events and common sense, to one conclusion: The survival of liberty in our land increasingly depends on the success of liberty in other lands. The best hope for peace in our world is the expansion of freedom in all the world.

Some, I know, have questioned the global appeal of liberty - though this time in history, four decades defined by the swiftest advance of freedom ever seen,
is an odd time for doubt.

Here's the transcript of his address.

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

It wasn't just about the WMD's people.

The OX Rant has several great points to make, if you can get a moonbat to read, let alone think.

Have You Ever ?

Found yourself with injuries you can't explain ? I noticed earlier today that my index finger had what I can only describe as four scratches, pretty deep. They didn't hurt, I just happened to see them. Then just now, hours later, my thumb on the same hand has four corresponding scratches. They were not there an hour ago. When I hold the finger and thumb together at a specific angle, the scratches line up perfect. The scratches on the thumb hurt. WTF is up with that ?

Top 45 Oxymorons

Brought to you by Oxymoron 5, for pimple-free teenagers.

And the truth is…

Click the pic to enlarge


Found at

Happy Birthday !

Rush Limbaugh (1951)

This Day In History

  • 1896 Dr. Henry Louis Smith takes the first X-ray photograph in U.S. history. The photograph is of a hand with a bullet in it.
  • 1949 "Kukla, Fran and Ollie", the Chicago-based children’s show, made its national debut on NBC-TV. A live, daily, ad-libbed puppet show that was watched by more adults than children.
  • 1966 "Batman" debuts on television.

Farewell, My Producer

Excerpts from the new Inspector Dan Rather mystery over at Iowahawk.

The Wayback Machine

This is so kewl. I found some of my old web sites going back to Dec 06, 1998 !

Monday, January 10, 2005

What A Classless Ass

Why Minnesota puts up with this jerk is beyond comprehension.

This Day In History

  • 1878 California Senator A.A. Sargent introduces the Susan B. Anthony (women's suffrage) Amendment to Congress. The amendment won't be signed into law for another 42 years. Can you imagine not "getting any" for 42 years ?
  • 1911 Major Jimmie Erickson took the first photograph from an airplane while flying over San Diego, CA. Evidently there was some chick laying out.
  • 1946 The first meeting of the United Nations General Assembly took place with 51 nations represented. They immediately passed resolutions blaming the United States for everything.
  • 2000 It was announced that AOL and Time Warner were merging. It was the largest media deal in U.S. history priced at $111 billion. The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) approved the deal on December 14, 2000. AOL customers are still considered the idiots of the InterNet.
  • 2003 North Korea announced that it was withdrawing from the global nuclear arms control treaty and that it had no plans to develop nuclear weapons. What ? Communists lie ? When did that start ?

Heads Finally Roll At SeeBS

Asked to resign were Senior Vice President Betsy West, who supervised CBS News primetime programs; 60 Minutes Wednesday Executive Producer Josh Howard; and Howard's deputy, Senior Broadcast Producer Mary Murphy. The producer of the piece, Mary Mapes, was terminated.

Dan blather should have been fired as well, but at least they got rid of Mapes.

While the panel found that some actions taken by CBS News encouraged such suspicions, the Panel cannot conclude that a political agenda at 60 Minutes Wednesday drove either the timing of the airing of the segment or its content."

Now that's a bunch a crap. It's blatantly obvious that there was a political agenda behind both the timing and the content.

The good folks over at have the best wrap-up.

Thursday, January 06, 2005

Happy Birthday !

  • Rowan Atkinson (1955) British comedian and actor with a passion for fast cars and goofy roles. Born in Durham, England, Atkinson started out as a comedy writer, before performing in comedy revues throughout England. He gained his first substantial notoriety when he began appearing in “The Blackadder” a BBC series he co-wrote with creative partner Richard Curtis. The show was a smash, and spawned three follow-up series. Atkinson has also achieved minor success in the movies and is most recognizable to American audiences as the verbally awkward priest who stole the show from Hugh Grant in 1994’s Four Weddings and a Funeral. Since 1990, Atkinson has perfected the role of Mr. Bean in the series of the same name. “Mr. Bean” provides the perfect theater for Atkinson’s physical comedy. Other Atkinson films include, The Witches, Hot Shots! Part Deux, Rat Race (2001), Scooby-DOO (2002), and Love Actually in 2003.

This Day In History

  • 1540 - King Henry VIII of England was married to Anne of Cleves, his fourth wife. The marriage was annulled on July 9, 1540, on the grounds that their marriage had never been consummated.
  • 1952 - "Peanuts" debuted in Sunday papers across the United States.
  • 1994 - Figure skater, Nancy Kerrigan, was clubbed on the right leg by an assailant at Cobo Arena in Detroit, MI. Four men were later sentenced to prison for the attack, including Tonya Harding's ex-husband.
  • 1999 - The 106th U.S. Congress opened. The first item on the agenda was the impeachment proceedings of President Bill Clinton. The trial was set to begin January 7, 1999.

Sunday, January 02, 2005

Democratic Rep. Bob Matsui Dies at 63

Good riddance. This Moonbat was a plague on our country.
Thank God this moron won't be around to push agendas like this anymore. We could do with a few more of his ilk dying.

Bush Faces Busy January Calendar

Democrats, who see the accounts as a boon for Wall Street, have said the eventual shortfall in Social Security benefits is "a manageable problem" that does not require extensive overhauls.

That made me laugh out loud. "a manageable problem" ? What planet do DemocRats live on ? Social (in)Security is a joke and President Bush is the only one with the guts to look the problems dead in the eye and try to address them. No wonder the DemocRats continue to lose elections. "manageable problem" ? Hello Mr. Ostrich ! Get you F'ing head out of the sand ! Your party created this mess. Don't you think you ought to try a little to fix it ?

Iraq's largest Sunni Muslim party has chosen not to participate, insurgents are continuing their attacks on Iraqi security forces and election workers.

Don't you love how the MSM calls Terrorists "Insurgents" ?