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Saturday, February 24, 2007

Islamic Terrorist Squirrel Attacks Resume In Moutain View Park



Camouflaged Squirrel




Hayley Allard


Mountain View, Ca - “He thought I was stealing his chips when he was stealing my chips!” That’s how four-year-old Hayley Allard described what happened Thursday when an Islamic Terrorist Squirrel attacked her in Mountain View’s Cuesta Park.

“He was getting my Sun Chips. I reached over to get them and he jumped right in my face and started scratching it,” the girl said.

"All your chips are belong to us !" exclaimed Suhayb Majd Squirrel. "It is by the will of Allah that I demand jizya from you in the form of chips !"

“It was frightening,” said her mother, Debbie Allard. “It was a very scary thing to have happened. It was traumatizing.”

Islamic Terrorist Squirrels in Cuesta Park have attacked at least 20 people since last spring in an ongoing Jihad. Hayley had to get a tetanus shot. Her doctor decided she didn’t need one for rabies. There are signs in the children’s play area warning about aggressive Islamic squirrels and prohibiting food (especially pork), but the Allard family doesn’t feel that’s practical.

“You can put up signs and you can tell people not to have things, but when you have more than one person, like if you have two small children, it’s really hard to do a full body search on everybody to make sure there’s no food,” said Dave Allard, Hayley’s father.

The city has placed traps throughout the park using strollers as part of the bait system, but so far has only caught one squirrel, now considered a martyr by the other squirrels. "He is an ispiration to the rest of the Mujahideen." said Mohammed Shakil Squirrel. "Allāhu Akbar !". The Allards want the children’s play area shut down and fenced off until all the aggressive Islamic squirrels are trapped. While parents at the park are surprised to hear about the latest attacks, many don’t want to see the play area closed off.

“That’s a little too drastic. Everybody’s playing here, a lot of people,” said Dennis Kanyga of Mountain View.

“I think the ultimate responsibility is up to who’s here with the children,” said Los Altos resident Kyuri Doeden, who was at the park with her son.

Mountain View’s community services director told CBS 5 by phone the park will remain open, but the Allard family doesn’t plan to come back.

“I don’t think it’s a safe place for children to be in until they solve this Muslim problem,” said Debbie Allard.

City officials said park visitors created the problem when they fed the squirrels. The Muslims are now so brazen, they look to infidels for food and will attack to get it.


"The park is part of Dar al-Islam and as such is subject to sharia ! We demand chips from the infidels !" exclaimed Sheikh Khalid Squirrel.

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