Government Commercials

So with all the monetary problems our country is having; why am I still hearing commercials on the radio telling me to be a good dad and how girls lose interest in science paid for by the government ? Really ? These are essential ?

Ambulance Runs

At least once a day an ambulance runs down Keeaumoku Street past where I work to Ala Moana Center. A good number of days there's more than one run. Wouldn't it be better to just have EMT staff there and save the time ?

The "W" Word

I met a lovely and charming woman while walking from the parking garage to work this morning. Her name was Kelly. We work for the same company in very different areas. We chatted up a storm and it was fun. Our conversation turned to where we live and she said the "W" word.

I hate the word "We" when it doesn't include me. :-|

Londo

I dreamt of my little buddy Londo last night.
It was good to have him around again, If only in a dream.
He was a good little cat.
He is missed.

Our Creek

We've gotten a lot of rain on Oahu today.

Our creek is flash-flooding.

It is quite loud.

It should make for some good sleeping tonight.

Darned Cat

My cat, Stanley H. Tweedle, scratched the heck out my nose while I slept last night. I don't even remember him doing it. I guess I'm a deep sleeper. So I woke up this morning with my pillows covered in blood. What died here last night ? It wasn't until I got to the mirror that I saw my nose. Funny, it never hurt. Sure looked a site though. I'd keep him out of my bed, but then he'd be outside the door all night meowing. What's A dude to do ? Only one person at work commented on it. Is it taboo to comment on someone's obvious injury or something ? Not the first time I've ran into that.

Sometimes I Hate Good Dreams

Just a dream of a simple walk arm in arm with someone I love can ruin my entire day.
Knowing I don't have someone to walk with and walking for me is physically painful these days. On top of that, the person I was walking with in the dream is lost to me forever. Sometimes good dreams suck.

Explosives Are Prohibited

I drive through tunnels almost every day.
They all have signs saying explosives are prohibited.
Gasoline is an explosive.

Great Start To The Day

As I was getting ready to head for work this morning I kept having the feeling I was forgetting something. I got all the way to work, turned off the engine and realized that I'd left my laptop at home. Nothing like a double commute to start the day.

Little Known Fact

Little known fact: BRB started off meaning Beer Run Babe or alternatively Beer Run Bud.

Random Thought

How does the phone know when I'm in the bathroom ?

I'm Not Drunk

I'm not drunk.
It's perfectly normal to try and light your cigar with your beer can.

Fire

Little known fact: The fire that destroyed the Library of Alexandria was caused by an ancient ancestor of the cow that caused the Chicago fire. Bad line of cows.



It's all part of the Cow Conspiracy.

Earth Hour

While I was celebrating "Earth Hour" by having all of my lights on, I asked my cat Stanley to name one other animal that could turn night into day.

He just looked at me.

Then I pressed my luck and asked him to name one other animal that could store food for months at a time.

He meowed which I took to mean Squirrels.

Touché Stanley.

So You Want To Save The Earth ?

So you want to save the Earth ?
Hello ?
The Earth is trying to kill you !
Tsunamis, hurricanes, tornadoes, earthquakes, mudslides, volcanoes, floods, droughts, wildfires, blizzards, ice storms, etc.
I say kill the Earth before it kills me !

;-p

Time Travel

If I could go back in time and change only one thing... it would be going back in time and only being able to change ONE thing.

Considerate Neighbor

Some considerate person(s) in my building went out for the evening and decided to leave their dog on their lanai. I hope they enjoy paying $100.00 fines as much as we enjoyed listening to their dog barking all night.

Survey

I had a woman call me with a four question survey tonight.
I said "Sure, why not ?"

Q1) How many people live in your home under the age of 15 ?"
A1) "None."

Q2) How many people live in your home between the ages of 15 and 17 ?"
A2) "None."

Q3) How many people live in your home between the ages of 18 and 21 ?"
A3) "None."

Q4) How many people live in your home between the ages of 22 and 34 ?"
A4) "None."

She was incredulous.
She asked me if I heard the fourth question and repeated it.

I said, "Let me look. Nope. Just me, and that was six questions."

I guess my household doesn't meet any of their demographics.

A household with no one under the age of 35 ? Inconceivable !

:-P

The Golf Club

There’s a local radio program named, “The Golf Club”.
They play a commercial where the hostess, Danielle Tucker says “The Golf Club” every other sentence.
By the time the spot is over, I want to take The Golf Club to her face.
:-P

Anna Nicole Smith, Still Dead

I think we'll all always remember where we were when we heard Anna Nicole Smith died.
;-P