Week Sauce (2/3) Weekend immune system

Starbucks is introducing a line of olive oil-infused coffees called Oleato. That’s Italian for “explosive diarrhea.” A Brazilian woman was arrested at an airport in Colombia for smuggling 130 endangered poisonous frogs in her luggage. Although she initially denied stealing the frogs, she then admitted: “Am fibbin’.”... Su

Week Sauce (2/3) Weekend immune system

Starbucks is introducing a line of olive oil-infused coffees called Oleato. That’s Italian for “explosive diarrhea.” A Brazilian woman was arrested at an airport in Colombia for smuggling 130 endangered poisonous frogs in her luggage. Although she initially denied stealing the frogs, she then admitted: “Am fibbin’.”...

The Bad Guys Gotta Be White Males or It's Racist

The Bad Guys Gotta Be White Males or It's Racist And if they're Christian, even worse JIM TREACHER FEB 2 In London, a man named Abdul Shakoor Ezedi is wanted for an “alkali attack” against a woman and her three-year-old daughter. He threw some sort of corrosive substance on them, causing severe burns. According to the BBC: Five police officers were injured as they responded, as were four members of the public who tried to help… One witness described seeing the suspect lift a young child over his head and throw her onto the ground like a "ragdoll", telling the BBC the incident was like a "horror movie". But wait, it gets worse: In 2018, Ezedi was convicted of one charge of sexual assault and one of exposure, before being granted asylum in 2020. He received a nine-week jail term suspended for two years for the sexual assault and, for the exposure, 36 weeks' imprisonment to be served consecutively, also suspended for two years. So this guy flees Afghanistan for the UK, rapes someone, gets a slap on the wrist, and is granted asylum. Then he runs around splashing toxic chemicals on people and attacking children. That’s happening right now. I thought about that story as I watched the latest episode of Criminal Record, streaming now on Apple TV+... © 2024 Jim Treacher 548 Market Street PMB 72296, San Francisco, CA 94104 Unsubscribe Get the appStart writing

You Need to Do Better, 2024 One month down, and Current Year stinks already

As we move deeper and deeper into the 21st Century, I just want to move deeper and deeper into a cool, dark cave, far away from everything and everyone. The more I learn about this world, the less I want to know. Here are a few of the things that are depressing me today. A 17-year-old boy from California named Alan Winston Filion was just arrested for allegedly running a nationwide swatting operation. I guess that’s how you get back at the world when the other kids won’t stop calling you Rosie O’Donnell... Who the Heck Is Jim Treacher © 2024 Jim Treacher 548 Market Street PMB 72296, San Francisco, CA 94104

Happy Anniversary, Jussie!

Happy Anniversary, Jussie! His bravery lives on JIM TREACHER JAN 29 Cast your mind back, dear reader, to this date a full five years ago: January 29, 2019. Joe Biden is assumed to be planning a presidential run at the age of 76. A Quarter Pounder with Cheese sets you back $3.89. Sports Illustrated still exists, the Marvel Cinematic Universe is an unstoppable critical and box-office phenomenon, and Taylor Swift is dating some British actor nobody knows or cares much about. You’ve never heard of COVID-19, or Disney Plus, or “WAP.” A simpler time. And on this date, in the middle of the coldest Chicago night in decades, a very famous actor named Jussie Smollett goes out for a sandwich and is attacked on the street by a couple of guys wearing red baseball hats. The vicious right-wing thugs splatter him with bleach and tie a clothesline around his neck while screaming, “You’re that [N-word] [F-word] from [FOX soap opera] Empire” and “This is MAGA country.” It’s a deeply disturbing assault that definitely isn’t complete caca del toro. The reaction among our moral, ethical, and intellectual betters is rapid and fierce:... © 2024 Jim Treacher 548 Market Street PMB 72296, San Francisco, CA 94104

Week Sauce (1/27) Weekend immune system

Snoop Dogg says he once angered Michael Jackson by accidentally blowing marijuana smoke in his face. Or at least he thinks it was Michael Jackson. A backup dancer for Lady Gaga is suing, claiming he suffered major hearing loss after several tours. On the bright side, now he doesn’t have to listen to Lady Gaga...

Friday Music Post Because it's Friday and I want to listen to some music

Are you tired of pretty much everything? Had it up to here with all this nonsense? Yeah, me too! So here’s some music I’ve been listening to lately to forget that the world is the way it is. Maybe it’ll help you too. WARNING: SOME OF THESE SONGS HAVE BAD WORDS IN THEM Idles, “Gift Horse” The less I understand these guys, the more I like them. Craziest grocery store ever. Or whatever they call it in England. They’ve got different names for everything over there. They’ve got a new album coming out on Feb. 16. It’s called Tangk, after the way their guitars sound. I’m just glad there are still bands like this out there. Not everything in 2024 is Taylor Swift, Ariana Grande, or some awful rapper who wasn’t even born yet when Run-DMC killed it. Speaking of bad rappers… Lil Dicky, “HAHAHA” Hey, have you ever heard of the Joker? This guy has! Lil Dicky isn’t my favorite rapper ever (that would be ODB, RIP), but his Hulu show Dave is pretty funny. And he’s a great 21st-Century success story. Within 10 years, he’s gone from posting his own funny music videos to hanging out with Brad Pitt and basically daring DC Comics to sue him. God bless America! The Chats, “I’ve Been Drunk in Every Pub in Brisbaine” This is a couple years old, and I don’t drink anymore, but it’s loud and it’s got a funny title and the guitarist looks like Stavros Halkias. Just basic, balls-to-the-wall punk from some snotty Australian drunks. Seems like the Aussies have more interesting music down there than we do these days. Maybe it’s the heat? Do they just go crazy? ZOMBI, “The Post-Atomic Horror” This is one of those bands that makes music that sounds like a schlocky ‘80s action movie soundtrack. Which is like a whole genre now. This is going on my “Writin’ Music” playlist. Propulsive, no lyrics. Perfect. Diamante, “1987” This little lady wasn’t even born yet in the year she’s singing about, but she’s absolutely correct to be nostalgic. The 1980s were the greatest decade in human history and it’s not even close.¹ And speaking of the greatest decade ever… KMFDM, “Airhead” Hey, remember these guys? I really like their latest, and the video somehow manages to compress my entire childhood into less than 5 minutes. Kinda sounds like a Garbage song from 1996. That’s a compliment, by the way. And as long as I’m feeling nostalgic, here’s one from around that time… David Bowie, “I’m Afraid of Americans” I hear ya, Dave. And finally… Tom MacDonald (feat. Ben Shapiro), “Facts” I’ve been following Ben Shapiro’s rap career for years, and this is his hottest banger yet. Apparently that other guy is Canadian. But I kinda like him anyway... © 2024 Jim Treacher 548 Market Street PMB 72296, San Francisco, CA 94104

Kayleigh McEnany Did Nothing Wrong, Part 2 Don't give your old boss good advice or he'll get mad JIM TREACHER JAN 24 ∙ PREVIEW

Kayleigh McEnany Did Nothing Wrong, Part 2 Don't give your old boss good advice or he'll get mad JIM TREACHER JAN 24 Last May, I took note of one of the many, many ex-Trump employees who had drawn his insatiable ire. No matter how loyal, none of his former associates can escape his wrath forever. Not even his most effective spokesperson ever: As I noted at the time: Keep in mind, McEnany didn’t insult him or anything. She just got a poll number slightly wrong. She was pointing out that Trump is ahead in the polls, and she still drew his ire because she worshipped him insufficiently. Now that he’s turned on McEnany, his dwindling retinue of minions will be expected to do the same. In order to Make America Great Again, you must hate whoever the boss hates, love whoever the boss loves, and then switch as instantly and aggressively as he does. That’s not a good thing, and I won’t pretend it is just to keep people from yelling at me. And now it’s happening again, because nothing else is even possible:... © 2024 Jim Treacher 548 Market Street PMB 72296, San Francisco, CA 94104

Week Sauce (1/20) Weekend immune system JIM TREACHER JAN 20 ∙ PREVIEW

In a scientific first, researchers have kept a cloned monkey alive for two years. As you can see, he’s healthy and thriving. A few Madonna fans have filed a class-action lawsuit because she keeps starting her shows late. If you’re still going to Madonna concerts in 2024, do you really have anywhere else to be? Or: They’re angry that they keep missing the early bird special at Denny’s. See, because Madonna is old and her fans are old. Green Day played a surprise acoustic concert this week in a Manhattan subway station. According to one reviewer: “Come on, man, I’m just trying to get home.”... Subscribe to Who the Heck Is Jim Treacher to read the rest. Become a paying subscriber of Who the Heck Is Jim Treacher to get access to this post and other subscriber-only content. Upgrade to paid A subscription gets you: Subscriber-only posts and full archive Post comments and join the community LIKE COMMENT RESTACK © 2024 Jim Treacher 548 Market Street PMB 72296, San Francisco, CA 94104 Unsubscribe

Who the Heck Is Jim Treacher

 

Week Sauce (1/6)

Weekend immune system

JIM TREACHER JAN 6 ∙ PREVIEW

Aaron Rodgers has suggested Jimmy Kimmel might be on Jeffrey Epstein’s client list.
Kimmel insists he never even met Epstein. Besides, he can’t exactly use his balls while they’re in his wife’s purse. Duh!...

Who the Heck Is Jim Treacher

Who the Heck Is Jim Treacher

© 2024 Jim Treacher
548 Market Street PMB 72296, San Francisco, CA 94104
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